This week I went to Disneyland for the first time ever. While waiting in line for Splash Mountain—part of a tightly planned schedule my boyfriend created to maximize my experience—we had an interesting conversation about the psychology of visiting the happiest place on Earth. He couldn’t remember who conducted this research study, but I found it so fascinating I feel compelled to discuss it here.
Walt Disney, he said, created something brilliant primarily because it gives the illusion of diverse experiences contained under one umbrella brand. In addition to exploring a variety of fantasy lands, a Disney guest can also experience the western frontier, New Orleans Square, Hollywood, and the remote jungles of Africa and Asia. He can ride a steam-powered locomotive, a monorail, a double-decker bus, and a horse-drawn streetcar. One day and $94 later, he feels he’s seen and experienced more life than he’d likely fit in the average year. Perhaps this is why Disney’s parks outperformed the rest of the company in the first quarter of 2009—and despite Disney’s overall decline in net income, park attendance in February was still up over that time in 2008.
According to the study, people receive the same psychological benefits by visiting Disneyland as they do when they have the actual experiences. Yet it was just an illusion.
I find this idea intriguing because I see parallels in our daily behavior—the pursuit of a fantasy that’s easier to attain than reality. I know I’ve many times done one of the following:
- Stayed in to watch re-runs of Friends instead of going out to meet new people
- Read a self-help book instead of doing something to help myself
- Went to see a romantic comedy instead of putting myself in a situation where I could meet men
- Re-read an old journal to feel I’ve “come so far” instead of pushing myself even further
- Looked through someone else’s vacation photos, imagining “some day” I’d go there, too
It’s not necessarily escapism I’m talking about, although the bad economy seems to inspire that, particularly when it comes to the movie industry. I’m more interested in our tendency to simulate life instead of living it—to blur the line between fantasy and reality because it’s easier and safer than making the latter look like the former. Or perhaps better said, what interests me is to what extent we’re willing to pretend instead of doing.
Does this resonate with you at all? Have you ever indulged an illusion to avoid the difficulty of making it reality?
“Illusions commend themselves to us because they save us pain and allow us to enjoy pleasure instead.” ~Sigmund Freud
By Lori Deschene
Tags: disneland, fantasy, illusion, pretending
Hi Lori –
I loved this post! I remember going to Disneyland as a child. I also remember going to DisneyWorld and Epcot Center. They are fabulous (but way too expensive) parks. I definitely have experienced what you describe, but I don’t cast it in a negative light. We only have one life to live, so it’s amazing that we can experience a variety of other lives through books, television, movies, internet, and also through the lives of our friends and family. It’s not on my priority list to travel the world, but I can simulate that experience through photos, ethnic restaurants, and the stories of others. So, yes, I live through that illusion, I love it, but I don’t think that it’s so terrible or wrong of me to not actually live it.
Excellent post! I’ve done all of the things you mentioned above and more. I’ve spent a lot of my life imagining life instead of actually living it and every day I’m working on changing that. It’s not easy, but it IS possible.
Vi~ I agree! It’s a wonderful thing that we have the ability to explore new lands and ideas through books, movies, and TV. I was just wondering if anyone could relate to the feeling of taking the easy route when you’d actually prefer to do something else.
Dani~ Thank you! I’ve been working on this one, as well. For a very long time I was more a spectator to life than anything else. You’re right that it isn’t easy–but so exciting, huh? =)
Hi Lori,
Great post!
Yes, I’ll admit I’ve indulged in fantasy
to avoid reality too.
However, if it wasn’t for the fantasy of
the future I’d see little reason to struggle
through the pain of the present.
And I’m indebted to my keen imagination
for making the tough times bearable.
I think it gives us the boost we need
to attain our goals.
A little bit of fantasy can go a
long way.
Loved this post.
Courtney James
The Obvious Writer
Great post, i find myself doing this from time to time, and altought it’s fun to imagine things, it’s much better to experience the real thing!. I don’t want to be an spectator, i want to be a player!
Hi Lori,
I am so with you on this post because this topic is something that fascinates me. I have come to notice that most of society think playing it safe is the right thing to do. I used to be of that mindset too, until I realized that my life was nothing like what I knew it could be. So I became determined to change my life and I did.
It was not easy and I did upset some people because I wanted to expand my horizons. I think many of us are trapped in illusions of our own making and as much as I love television, I think it has dumbed us down a bit.
Lori,
I really love and appreciate this post. We all have he ability to get stuck in our own minds’ instead of actually living or doing what we only dream about! This gave me a perfect mental kick today ,thank you!
I have the instinct that playing it safe is the way to go, however I have come to realize that even if you play it safe it guarantees nothing. You can still loose everything and/or gain huge amounts of wealth if you play it safe or risk it all. I learned we have control over what we do and say and that in turn affects other things, but it is only through those actions that we can manipulate our situations. I think the amount of control we think we have is just an illusion. I heard a quote somewhere and I can’t remember who said it, but it was something about learning how to live is mostly learning when to hang on and when to let go. So sometimes “playing it safe” is probably the right thing to do, however it’s probably not the right thing to do always. I have always had a vivid imagination since I was little and would often play out situations in my head to see if I should continue or not. Now, however, I have realized how surprised I can be when I have calculated the simulation in my head completely wrong.
I guess I mean to say is Disneyland can be an experience all on it’s own, even if you were to actually go to all those countries and places, it would still probably feel different because of the atmosphere of the crowds and the rate at which you go from zone to zone. I think people should experience both the real things and sometimes simulations because since it has a different feel, you are experiencing yet something new than just going to New Orleans/Jungles of Africa. I think we need a balance of imagination and that which is authentic and real, just one alone is not as great. Pretending is great, just not if that’s all you do.
Wow! Great post. Really hits home. There’s just one thing I wanted to comment on in particular: I read self-help books TO help myself – and they’ve helped me a lot over the years. Unless you meant reading it over and over after you’ve already digested its contents – that’s different, of course. But the information many contain can really help to get people going. At least they do for me. But again, great post! Thanks!
Tina
There’s a great flip side to imagining and fantasizing life. Think of it as an exercise. When I’m in a brand new POTENTIAL situation, I have as much fun as I can thinking about the possibilities. Whether it’s a budding relationship, new job, even a new commute via a different transportation, I imagine what could be all the great things it will add to my life, no holds barred. I get the immediate joy and benefits from imagining, but then get to hit the grand running as I enter real life. With proper expectations management, everyday is about making your dreams come true, rather than dreaming the too good to be true.
The worst that could happen is it doesn’t turn out the way you wanted and imagined, but I know that going in. The best part is no one can take away the fun “memories” of the exercise I had in my head before it “didn’t work out.” Everything means something, real or fantasy, b/c they both bring joy.
I do this kind of thing ALL THE TIME. I used to blame this on being a lover of books & a writer. But I see & know now that “imaging life” instead of living it is actually something a lot of people do. I think sometimes it’s okay to daydream – okay to sit at home reading a self help book instead of being out doing something. But sitting around reading, thinking & dreaming will never get you anywhere without that whole DOING part.
I think that it’s all about finding a balance. Thanks for this post <3
Dusan~ I couldn’t agree with you more. I definitely think it’s valuable to indulge a little imagination time, but too much of it can leave you feeling like–well, a spectator! I know that feeling well.
Nadia~ I agree with you, and to some extent, I think advances in technology encourage us to “play it safe.” Instead of being fully present in a new and potentially scary situation, we pull out our iPhones and tweet about it.
Christina~ How nice to see you here! I’m so glad you enjoyed this post and that it gave you a boost of motivation. I’m giving myself a little mental kick, too =)
Mike~ You make some great points, first about the illusion of control. When you receive emotional benefits from watching life, you don’t have the same risk of pain, as in the Freud quote. And I agree with you about a balance between pretending and doing. We pretend as kids because it prepares us for life. The only problem occurs when we don’t take the preparation into the real world.
Tina~ Thank you! You bring up a great point about self-help books. If you actually apply the knowledge, I agree they’re quite useful. I was thinking about times when I’ve read a self-help book but not actually done anything with the information. Seems kind of silly, I know, but I’ve done it! It’s almost like I’ve tricked myself into believing just buying and reading the book was sufficient effort.
Mike~ “I get the immediate joy and benefits from imagining, but then get to hit the grand running as I enter real life.” <—I think this nicely sums up how to effectively leverage your imagination for real-world benefits. Thanks for sharing this =)
Erica~ Yes! That’s exactly what I was talking about. I think it’s very common for writers particularly. Our work is to conceptualize and imagine. Useful activities for what we create, but if not balanced with activity, it can leave you feeling a bit disconnected from reality.
Courtney~ Hi there! I missed your comment before because it got caught in my spam filter for some reason. You bring up an interesting point:
“…if it wasn’t for the fantasy of the future I’d see little reason to struggle through the pain of the present.”
I’m wondering, if we view the present as something to struggle through, alleviated by fantasies of a better future, when does the present moment become that something better? When does the ideal we imagine become reality instead of the pain we want to escape?
Lori,
You make excellent points about wasting the present moment and fantasizing, but when you are depressed or gravely ill, fantasies get you through it. They are much better than wallowing in self pity and grief.
You have to analyze what you’re doing to see if you’re avoiding someone or a problem by fantasizing. Sometimes, though, you have to wait to realize your fantasies. This happens when someone really loves another person and she has to wait for the right time to act. The waiting is worth it if that man is the love of your life.
If he is just an illusion or not meant for you, though, you have to move on. The difficult part is knowing when to move on and how to do that without breaking your heart. That’s why I pray a lot!
Lisa~ I know what you mean about pushing through uncomfortable situations by hoping for a better future. I am reading about this very idea in “The Power of Now.” (My second time reading it–I highly recommend it!) Here’s what Eckart Tolle has to say:
“…the past gives you an identity and the future holds the promise of salvation, of fulfillment in any form. Both are illusions…break the old pattern of present moment denial and present moment resistance. Make it your practice to withdraw attention from past and future whenever they are not needed…If then you become excessively focused on a goal, perhaps because you are seeking happiness, fulfillment or a more complete sense of self in it, the Now is no longer honored.”
To play the devil’s advocate, I ask you this: if you live your now fantasizing about a relationship–biding your time until you can act, praying for it–and then that person meets and marries someone else, how valuable was that time you spent fantasizing beyond the enjoyment you got through indulging it? I don’t know the answer; and I don’t mean to negate your comment. I’m just wondering if fantasizing in that way is an avoidance tactic that allows us to escape what is instead of embracing it.
The concept of indulging in vicarious experiences (even your own past ones) that you explore here is eye-opening. As a movie buff, I definitely relate. In fact, overwhelming yourself with illusion can make life seem surreal and somewhat boring. I’ve been there too.
It’s not even the difficulty of pushing yourself into new experiences, it’s instead about not being comfortable. Comfort is overrated. It doesn’t promote risk-taking, tells you to settle, and makes you live life on the couch instead of out…in general.
That’s me agreeing. On the counterargument side, I think you can grow to love and enjoy watching movies, reading books, looking at photos, just because. It makes you happy, it makes you get out of your comfort zone, exposing you to things, ideas, people you may never have imagined. I always played soccer better after watching it. Same with vicarious experiences. Some people aren’t cut out for extroverted mingling and need a little nudge. It’s not just shyness, it’s confidence, or the lack thereof.
Living through someone else’s skin first can boost you into gear for living through your own, and that’s not so bad.
Pretty cool post. I just stumbled upon your site and wanted to say
that I have really enjoyed browsing your blog posts. Any way
I’ll be subscribing to your feed and I hope you post again soon!
Great stuff Lori! Your parallels definitely resonate with me.
We construct amazing things in our minds when we should be learning to do things with our bodies.
Akshay~ I so agree with you about comfort. Indulging an illusion feels safe, whereas getting out there can be scary with all the uncertainty it entails. “Living through someone else’s skin first can boost you into gear for living through your own, and that’s not so bad.” <–well said!
Sarah~ I’m glad you enjoyed them! I am moving this week so I won’t be posting regularly, but I will be back to posting at least twice weekly after that
Joshua~ Thanks! I love how you phrased this. I’ve lived life in my head for a long time, allowing myself to believe excessive thought was the same as active involvement in the world. Now that I see the difference I am so glad I pushed myself. Still have to push myself a lot, but awareness is a huge step.
All the time.
The heading alone was all I needed to read to put my hand up and say, “Yep! That’s me!..”